I was sitting in the back of my Uber replaying the wild birthday behavior from the night before, praying to God the hangover symptoms didn't resurface during my long bus ride home from NY when I got the call from my ex. He received a drunken call from me, which ended with him hanging up. I spent the entire dinner being a total slop bop, in the restaurant's bathroom throwing up and crying over him. I literally took the "It's my birthday, I can cry if I want too" song to the next level that night. He called the next day to check on me. I wasn't ok, but I lied and told him everything was good (he knew I was lying). I don't remember what he said exactly, but he told me that I "NEEDED TO LET THOSE DEMONS OUT."
His words lingered in my mind. "Demons" tho?! Damn why he call me out like that. At the time I didn't want to admit it, but he was right. I had spent years repressing and suppressing my wounds from childhood trauma to his emotional unavailable ways. Pushing the things I didn't want to deal with in my back of mind. I guess that night was my breaking point because when I got home I started getting down to the root of my problems.
The femininity journey is not all light, love, or looking good. You have to go into the DARK to become more SELF AWARE, EMOTIONALLY, and MENTALLY healthy to have inner peace. It can be very difficult to come face to face with SHADOW self so please seek a mental health professional, life coach, or someone you trust to help heal your wounds properly. Here are the areas I personally worked on to become a better me.
Poor Dating Choices
Soul Tie Cycles
The Inner Child
Personal Patterns
Fear Factors
I am NOT a professional, just speaking from experience. What worked for me may not work for you so please take what RESONATES with YOU and leave the rest on the table. Please share your thoughts below! I would love to know what you think. Happy healing.
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